kuch bhi ..kya tobhi.....chuppich

Fate, Faith & Finding stillness...

2009-01-30T15:09:00.016+05:30

When one has lived a certain amount of time one accumulates a varied experience. The entire Experience eventually stored away somewhere within the grey matter and termed as Memories. Again varied Memories. Some relegated to deep dark corners of the mind never to be summoned up. Others as fresh as if they were happening right now.

Similar situations crop up time and again with dissimilar reactions from us every single time. To think one would learn from ones own mistakes or know how to tackle a scenario one has already seen!

One gets accustomed to both expecting from and reacting to Life. One Expects that kick in the teeth. One Reacts by ducking away, just in time. One Expects that healing touch, one Reacts by reaching out, moving closer to turn it into a hug.

One Expects the tap to eventually start dripping, one Reacts by bring out the plumbing tools. One Expects the advent of festivals, one Reacts by adding festoons to the festivities.

Somewhere down the line a cynicism stands ready to creep in. One expects the tap to drip and Reacts if it doesn't. One expects loss, but is surprised by a gain instead. Always a predisposed reaction ready to pounce in. So why does a gain instead of a loss bring surprise? And not just surprise but also cynicism, an expectancy of gain turning to loss. Is it a resignation at Fate's foot?

What if Fate, Destiny is determined to give a pat on the back instead of a kick in the guts? Naaah, how is that possible? After all how can Fate be so benevolent? Distrusting Fate comes easier than trusting it at face value, doesn't it? What if it throws wide open the land of beliefs when it deals its hand? For you to go make it your own? What if it tries to restore a semblance of Faith? Would you for once decide to be kind to your own self and Accept it keeping aside what you Expect?

Difficult to accept, more difficult to ignore. No matter what the decision a turbulent state of mind is what emerges. Imagine not reacting as predisposed? Or even changing this basic reaction of disbelief and cynicism to one of gentle acceptance? So no matter if its a pat or a push that Fate delivers, bringing with it fathomless amount of Faith what it gets in return is almost Stillness.

Stillness with smiles

and laughter

and tears

and giggles

and cries

and "wow"s

and "ouch"es;

Stillness within.

Stillness and Faith.

A lil insight into what makes me tick...(me a thoroughbred Aqua a.k.a Uranian)

2009-01-21T19:53:00.007+05:30

Aquarius/Let the sunshine in

When the Moon is in the Seventh House, and Jupiter aligns with Mars
Then peace shall guide the planets, and love will steer the stars
This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius ….

******************

Harmony and understanding
Sympathy and trust abounding
No more forces of derision
Golden living dreams of visions
Mystic crystal revelations
And the mind’s true liberation

This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius

Aquarius Aquarius

******************

Source: California Psychics

Is your inner rebel ready to rock 'n' roll? As the Sun transits through Aquarius from January 19 - February 18, 2009, you may find yourself ready to shake things up. With unconventional Uranus as its ruler, Aquarius is the boat-rocker of the zodiac, always wanting to change things for the better (or just for the heck of it). It's also the activist who fights for a cause to improve humanity.

On a personal level, friendship is important to this social Air sign, which shines in group settings. What's more, lucky Jupiter is also in Aquarius (throughout the year), which makes it the perfect time for getting together with friends and getting involved in your community.

So let's take a closer look at the wild and wacky (and often brilliant) Aquarian.

Aquarius psyche

Aquarius, as the saying goes, follows the beat of a different drum. They are innovative, original and independent, with an affinity for weird (to the rest of us, anyway) people, places and occupations. Never one to go with the social flow, Aquarius doesn't hesitate to buck the trend and become the trendsetter. They seem to have a sixth sense about where society is heading, and they usually head there one step ahead of everyone else.

However, their originality and rebelliousness can make them feel like outcasts. It's not that they can't follow the rules, it's just that Aquarius becomes incensed by regulations that impede their rights - or the rights of others. Their need to demolish outmoded protocols can seem like anarchy to security-oriented folks, but without tearing down the old to make way for the new, we'd have no room for innovation. And Aquarius is all about innovation. It rules technology, after all. It's up to the Water-bearer to propel the rest of us into the New Age.

The keyword for Aquarius is "I know." They can have an intriguing mix of interests, both otherworldly and scientific. Their keen mind is highly logical and therefore adept at scientific principles. However, their curiosity for the unknown can lead them to study metaphysics as well. From astrology to quantum physics, anything that explains how the universe works will capture the attention of Aquarius.

Aquarius in love

The Water-bearer's unconventional nature makes traditional relationships difficult, if not impossible. And they have a wild side they never completely outgrow. As such, they need a partner who respects their need for extreme independence. And one who accepts their strange (but fascinating!) cadre of friends, including ones of the opposite sex. Yes, of all the signs, Aquarius is the most likely to have completely platonic friendships, which means they need a partner whose jealousy isn't easily aroused.

As a brainy Air sign, Aquarius can seem detached, even in intimate relationships. They can be insightful and deeply compassionate, but in a cerebral way. Sexually, Aquarius likes to experiment. They can get bored easily, however, both in and out of the bedroom, so if you're in love with an Aquarius, keeping them intrigued will be your challenge. The best way to enthrall your Water-bearer is to share a mind-to-mind connection by bringing in new ideas, social connections, cultural activities and even sexual techniques. As long as their mind is turned on, they'll be yours forever.

Aquarius at work

From avant-garde artist to astrophysicist, Aquarius works best in fields that use their creative brainpower. Science, technology, the arts and social work are good choices for most Aquarians. They excel as computer scientists, engineers, activists, psychotherapists, musicians, mathematicians, teachers, revolutionaries, writers, philosophers, historians or Peace Corps workers. Whatever they choose to do, Aquarians need to develop their intellect so they don't just drift through life, flitting from one social encounter to another. When they find their true calling, their brilliance is unmatchable.

So during the time of Aquarius, have fun with friends, help someone in need and share your inner light with the world.

Cortney Litwin is the co-host of the Cosmic Sutra on KarmaSolRadio, an online talk show featuring astrology and dream interpretation.

Who's dream was it anyway!

2009-01-04T11:31:00.019+05:30

"A dream is a wish your heart makes...."

It has been happening of late even more often. Things that I dreamt of doing, places that I wished, with my entire heart, of seeing one day, people I hoped to meet; all these dreams, wishes, hopes are coming true.

A bit overwhelming. Especially since the unexpected , though oh-so-finger-crossedly wished for, comes into existence with such frequency.

Goals are set and worked towards. They are achieved, revised, disposed off, retrieved, reset. Try doing that with dreams. Of course all that and more is possible in lucid dreaming.

Dreams in general are other-worldly. Many of them you'd rather not have come true. But yet in heart of hearts hope that they do. So what if they are bizarre you do have the courage to face them. You do. You really truly do. So do I.

When I dreamt of walking down the by-lanes of the far away seaside town, I knew I could put one foot ahead of the other and vice versa. My foot, my shoes, my shoe laces...

When I dreamt of getting just that shade there next to that tint on paper, I knew how much water would be needed to dilute the colour. My fingers holding the brush...

When I dreamt of saying hello to that person, I knew it would be a Hello and not a Hi. My voice, my hand for the handshake...

But...

Feet have trodden the paths in that seaside town only not mine. Echoes of the footsteps reached me through holiday "snaps". The brushstrokes are not familiar, the tints are; neither mine. The smile that accompanied the handshake wasn't mine either.

My dreams are coming true. Only someone else is living them.

It is heartbreaking to watch my dreams unfolding in such a manner, with a different lead to a different beat.

I wonder....am I living someone else's dream right now?

They Are. But who are they? (Part 1)

2008-11-08T20:33:00.026+05:30

I see her almost every morning.

Our paths crossing at the exact spot they did yesterday and all the days gone by. Nonchalant in her posture, breezy in her gestures, intense as she turns her head slightly to give but a glimpse of her semi-chiseled features.

Were we to come face to face I wouldn't recognize her. Were she to walk away from me, perhaps, I would. She always has her back towards me as I pass by.

Sometimes, as she looks up to talk to a passerby she offers a half smile . At least all I can see is just half of it. I wonder if she'd look at me if I were to walk by? Would I stop long enough for her to glance at me?

Something compels me to look her way every single time. The rare mornings that she isn't in sight, that something compels me to look back again and again. Hoping she might have appeared by then. She never does.

Why doesn't that Something compel me to stop going on my way and go seek her out? I wouldn't know where to seek!

She sits there on the footpath. Her back turned to the busy road that dips down the bridge to the signal. She sits facing the wall, more interested in the clicking heels than the blaring horns behind her.

She never appears to seek alms. Then what is that she does there every morning? What does she say to the one's she turns her face to as they pass by and stop for a moment before her? Would she talk if it were me listening?

Perhaps someday she might get off the footpath or I get on it. We might talk.

Till then... I see her almost every morning wearing her trademark off-shoulder blouses. She doesn't need the left sleeve for protecting her arm. The protruding bone got covered with skin a long time back.

Someday, perhaps, I shall stop and walk up to her and ask her.

Until then... I hope to see her again in the morning. Sitting there with her back to me. And envy her a little now and then.

You see, for all the missing arms, off-shoulder blouses, alms-not-sought, sitting on footpaths, She never has a bad-hair day.

just remembered...

2008-09-15T22:24:00.003+05:30

14th of august this year...

I-Day celebrations in office, a day ahead of schedule as the next day was a holiday...

Vande Mataram being sung...

the loudest voices heard were the usual ones...

the rest... lip-sync-ing...

not for long...

as the song tapered the silent voices rose..

15th of august this year...

yet another round of Dark Knight...IMAX...

Vande Mataram...

Ages since i've heard it being played in theatres...

Who were those few who did not stand up?

Who were those so many others who sang out loud and clear, right from the first note to the final?

And who were those who were too embarrased to stay sitting...but were bold enough to join in the tapering song..........?

Words can....

2008-08-14T23:10:00.012+05:30

Scatter,
Shatter,
and what not...

Just as I was re-discovering the charm of a carefully planned swagger came a thoughtful word.
Never saw it coming,I swear, not even through the very corner-est of my eye. Though you might say, rightly, that I "asked for it". Oh yes, I did.

But all I'd asked was a simple, innocent, non-fishin-for-compliments kind of, curiosity laden query (query sounds so much more professional than question. of course question has more Indy Jones swing to it..."quest i am on"...)

Or was it a question cloaked as a query? The response did come swinging in, fast and silent. The answer a word which gently nudges the swagger; just that little bit to leave one tottering on the brink of nothing!!

So, does a simple, innocent, non-fishin-for-compliments kind of, curiosity laden question deserve a response of such magnitude? One totally unexpected and absolutely necessary? No and Yes; No because of the later and Yes for the former.

After all all quests need their snake-pits and Arcs and Blood, sweat and tears (sob)..their unexpected events. Quests are not necessary, they are just an Inevitable Happening. And what better potion to have in your rucksack than a Word. One with power enough to sweet-talk snakes in pits or outside, fetch Arcs, make us bleed and sweat and cut through swaggers to leave even Indy in tears....soul-wrenching stuff.

As for me...well...plannin nother swagger for the morrow.
And WORD, the next time it's going to take you more than a nudge............

The Shadow of the Wind

2008-08-13T21:44:00.018+05:30

This is the book by Carlos Ruiz Zafon. Exotic name. Didn't realise it till I typed it out just now.
There it was, just one of the books lying, rather standing upright, on a bookshelf at some bookmall (how impersonal! stuff for another post). Wonder what made me reach out to this particular thin something when there were so many brighter, flashier, jucier ones around? Could hardly see the cover! The spine didn't tell much, though so important in a book and a man.
Was it the word Shadow? Perhaps it was, as round about that time I had curiously developed this attraction to the word. Language, font, audio, video, synonyms no bar. Something mystical about it. Haa khel saavalyancha played so often on the pod.
More than all of this was the underlying truth of INSTINCT. That is what had made me reach out to this book. That is what had made me pick the others. Yes, there have been more that have come into my life in this manner. Bringing with them a person who had gathered all those familiar words, put them together; all held as one creation by that very spine which introduced itself to me.
Touchwood. All these experiences have been and still are enthralling. Chance and instinct bringing the to-be-favourite writer into my hands!
Strange then, or maybe not, that this book should be about a book-guardian who chooses the book he is to guard in the same manner. By Instinct.

Midnight musings 001 (yup..there are going to be plenty of these if i continue posting)

2008-08-11T23:34:00.007+05:30

Why oh why is it that i find penning down words, on randomly flipped pages, easier than posting a blog? Sheer laziness? Or is it that though there is a lot to talk about the moot Q still does remain: does the world need to know?
Perhaps i still subconsciously equate a post to scribblings in a diary??!! hence would rather not post at all? Simply another veil to keep the world from knowing???!!!
Oh, are we here talking about the answer to the question that the world would be better off not knowing, or for that matter, knowing? Protectors, Saviours, Termintors, is that how we fancy ourselves? We do, as all of those from time to time. If not of The World then at least of Our Own Worlds....(rest of this some other day)

once more...here i go...

2008-07-18T15:08:00.000+05:30

An attempt, once again, at blogging. Wonder how many times a blog was created just to be lost or simply misplaced.
As i type this, am reminded of why my first ever blog, attempted-blog, was even posted in the first place. An online friend, sadly misinterpreted me and wished to read my blog. So a tentative attempt was made. With decent results, mind you.